Tuesday, March 9, 2010

The Things We Face Everyday Draft

Decisions are something we make every single day of our life. It may be big or simple ones, but we always have to face the consequences either way. A teen choosing to drink and drive, then runs over a child after speeding is a bad decision. The teen will have to live with the consequences all their life. Results of decisions may be something that will change your life forever or just something you expected. If we only knew what the answer was first then we wouldn't hesitate to choose or worry about the results in the end. The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemingway, Santiago goes through many decisions like choosing to go fishing without the boy, waiting for the marlin, and fighting off the sharks, so he had to face their consequences. His life wasn’t fully infected by these consequences, but he learned from them and moved on.
The first decision Santiago made was not letting the boy go fishing with him. Santiago was being humble and thoughtful because he knew that Manolin's parents didn't like him fishing with someone with no luck. The old man was being nice, but it made him lose a chance at his dream. Santiago was also trying to prove that he could still be a champion like before and get an amazing catch by himself, but if the boy had gone, then the old man would've caught the marlin sooner and brought it back as a whole. The old man at the beginning of the book pretended to reject the boy, but during his whole trip he was wishing the boy was there. “I wish I had the boy. To help me and see this.”(48). Because of not letting the boy go with him, Santiago had to face hardships on the boat and was not able to bring home his prize.
The second and great decision Santiago made was being patient and waited for the marlin. The old man knew that he was going to be able and reel in the fish, so he waited. This was a good decision because he knew that patience would be repaid. Even though he waited, the marlin didn't give up until four days later. If he had left, then he would've not caught anything or had the fight of his life. (quote) shows his determination to catch the fish and I admire this patience and determination very much. The consequence of this decision proved his willpower to be worthwhile. He eventually reeled in the fish, but luck got ran out when he faced the sharks. It’s exactly how life is. Luck will sometimes take away the things you cherish the most.
The third decision of Santiago was choosing to fight off the Mako and other sharks. This choice was very brave and showed how much he cherished his prize.(quote) This action is worth admiring because Santiago could've died, but he knew that he had to protect his hard work with his life. After fighting off the Mako, other sharks came and took away his friend. There was barely anything left of his friend and it left him hopeless. He fought them with everything he had, but it wasn't good enough. This scenario shows how that life is full of many surprises and not everything can go your way even if you made the best decision.
In Old Man and the Sea, Santiago faces many events that he has to make decisions. Most of the time he made decisions that we would make, but luck just ran out on him. Santiago probably regretted about going out too far or even catching the marlin, but either way he had to live with the consequences. No matter what the consequences are, I think that good will eventually come out in the end. For example, even though the old man lost the fish, the other fishermen gave him respect for his accomplishment and he learned how much he needed the boy. Some good will eventually turn out in everything.

6 comments:

  1. 1~ The thesis is “Decisions are something we make every single day of our life.” It is very clear what they are getting to because I can tell that its will be about decision making and the result. It is pretty engaging I want to see what more they will say because there is so much behind decision making.
    2~ The first quote “I wish I had the boy. To help me and see this.”(48). This is a very strong quote and fits into the paragraph very well also. It is because it’s the only quote they found so far and it has a lot of feeling so you get a hint of how they feel.
    3~ The thing about this essay that is very well I believe is organization. With having the examples in the middle and opening and a closing that fits really well like the first sentence in the closing paragraph, “In Old Man and the Sea, Santiago faces many events that he has to make decisions.” It is and overall statement and help sums it up.
    4~ It is a really good essay and what you can do to improve it would be to get the good quotes and stuff. That is where you essay is lacking. So look in the book and round up some good ones.

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  2. 1) “Decisions are something we make every single day of our life.” I like this as your thesis. It adds originality to your essay and introduces your essays topic creatively.
    2) The first quote “I wish I had the boy. To help me and see this.”(48). It has a lot of feeling so you get a hint of how they feel.
    3) I believe your organization is one of the strongest points of your essay.
    4) Your essay is really good. I found very little I would change to improve your essay. 8D

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  3. I. The thesis of the story is- The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemingway, Santiago goes through many decisions like choosing to go fishing without the boy, waiting for the marlin, and fighting off the sharks, so he had to face their consequences. I think that this thesis is focused, because it explains exactly the points that she is making, and is to the point with them.

    II. Since you only have one quote in your essay, I think that that one is the best. You used the quote well and integrated it into your essay to your advantage. One thing you need to do though is be more analytical with it, because that will support your thesis better.

    III. I thought your introduction was really good. I really liked how you gave a real life example to bring in your decisions subject. I think that it really made your essay engaging and interesting to read on and got me hooked. Good job :)

    IV. One major problem with your essay is your lack of quotes. Your use and analyzing of the quotes is the main point of this essay, so that is really important in your orginization and your supporting paragraphs. Other than that you had great points and I think you did a really good job. :)

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  4. 1) This essay’s thesis is about how Santiago had to make choices, and that there were concequences to them. I believe it is very clear, and it is straight forward. It lays out exactly what the essay is going to be talking about. I think she could make it a little bit more engaging but I just don’t know how she could.

    2) I think that the example of a teenager drinking and driving is the strongest because it is more relatable to our age group than everything she could have said about the book. She only has one other quote, and I definetly think that the one I said was the strongest. It was described pretty well, but at one part or the other it was a bit confusing.

    3) I think that Lisa does a great job at describing the motive behind Santiago’s actions. The essay is also really organized well, and it was really focused on the thesis. She did a fantastic job in general.

    4) She needs to add quotes, which she knows, and she knows exactly where she will put them. Also, in some places the grammar was a little off and it got challenging to read. I think that she could have better adjectives and richer word choice, but overall the essay was really good.

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  5. 1) the thesis of the story is that the old man from the old man and the sea has too make many difficult decisions and they all come with consequences

    2) the best quote i thought in the essay I wish I had the boy. To help me and see this.”(48). it really shows how the old man is feeling and how much he wants manolin to be there with him

    3)the strenth of this essay was its organization and example in the intoduction paragrapgh.

    4) i thought that the essay was really good, but just added more descriptive vocabulary

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